The Guide to Blogging Etiquette
Since there’s been much talk about blogging properly, here’s my easy guide for n00bies on blogging etiquette:
1. Always bow before you blog.
given how clumsy i am, chances are i would bow so hard, my head would detach itself from my body, go clink-clong-ing down the slope onto the state-owned-but-open-for-people-to-tak-qiu-@-their-own-risk field. which meant another area to avoid @ all risks coz “eeee……. got a head roll down there before…… sure got hantu one!!!”
2. When you blog, do remember that the knife goes in the right hand, and the fork in the left.
this is a rule i would never remember coz by default, my knife goes in the left whereas the fork goes in the right. dun ask me why. coz i also dunno why.
3. Always end your posts with “thank you, it’s been wonderful talking to all of you. Godspeed.”
difficult to do….. coz sometimes, it has not been a wonderful time
arguing talking to people, especially when terms of endearment such as JERK!, BITCH!, YOU PERVERT! has been deployed to ehhhhhh express our mutual excitment in talking to each other.
4. Polite bloggers NEVER use the words “asshat” or “aardvark”. Whether “sexy motherf***er” can be said in polite company remains a matter of much contention. Particularly on the question of how to pronounce asterisks.
eh………. JERK!, BITCH!, YOU PERVERT! can or not har?? these are terms of endearment….. really!
5. The proper way to end a first blog is with a little kiss. No tongue.
ulcer lahz… wait will spread…
6. And, especially, no tongue down there.
7. Remember, if you forget which keys to use, a simple little memory trick is that you should start from the outside and work your way inside. Hence, posts like “poiuy!” are the height of decorum.
8. When someone visits your blog, be sure to offer drinks.
sir, coffee, tea or me…. ermmmmmm mee-lor……
9. If you are a male blogger and said visitor is female, please remember to raise your hat when the visitor enters your blog.
phew, not applicable!
10. Yes, you must have a hat.
but who wears a hat these days?? cap can or not??? not bottle cap, the baseball/army/hip hop/etc cap, can?? can lahz……
Thank you. It’s been wonderful talking to all of you. Godspeed.
how fast is Godspeed har???? how many km/h in a how many km/h zone??? Godspeed will kena san-man or not?? got speed-camera there???